Untitled.

June, 2007 - Bulungan

Our first meeting (Iwed & Die)

I went to a gig where a band named Purgatory performed that nite. They did it, it was an awesome performance. After the gig, my friend brought me to the backstage and introduced me to Purga's members. They were nice & friendly. I even got to take some pictures with their guitarist; Die. He was nice and everything. We talked but just for a minute. I had to go home real soon coz it was getting really late.

August, 2007 - Bulungan

My first performance with Gelap, Bulungan

I performed with Gelap for the first time since I joined them in July, 2007. I was excited and nervous at the same time. That was my first strike on metal scene. We did it, though... It was a blasting night. And I was surprised that Die came to watch my performance with Gelap. He said he likes my performance. Some other friends of mine also came to support us. I feel so honored and thankful. I and Die talked a bit and that's it. We split to get mingle with other friends. That nite ended with a full smile on everyone's face.

November, 2007 - Ciledug

Iwed & Die at Bounty & Diella's wedding party

I went to Bounty & Diella's wedding at Diella's house in Ciledug. Bounty was Die's friend and they were on the same band. So I met him again there. We had better chat this time, coz we weren't surrounding by chaotic music and had to socialized with people on the gig like the condition that always appeared everytime we met. So we were talking, or sharing was more likely, about things more personal. Him with his issues and so did I with mine. One thing that got in my mind that time was he was a good interlocutor and a good listener. Finally got to meet a cool friend that never hide anything so that he will look cool in front of others :)

New Year's Eve, 2008 - Senayan

Sound of Spirit, Senayan. New year's eve 2008

Gelap made a performance on a gig called Sound of Spirit in New Year's Eve. Purgatory also performed there. Since Die got to perform at 2 a.m., and Gelap had made their performance at 11 p.m, I had to wait him (and it was a loong waiting, ladies and gents, under the rain. Zzz...) to be on stage for almost 3 hours. But it's all worth it, though. Purgatory (with him in it) never failed me, heheh... :D Was thinking to spend the rest of the night waiting till dawn at their basecamp, but then again I thought I would just stayed over at Rins' house. It was definitely one of the best gigs I ever performed in :)

Early March, 2008

It's been a while since the last time I talked to Die over the phone, SMS or personally. Till on midnite, one of my friends - Imron - texted me the news that Die had an accident on the road near Citraland Mall. He asked me to call him to check his condition. But well, it's midnite and I guessed he was already asleep by then. So I called him the day after and we talked. I encouraged him and wished him to get well soon. He also wished me to have a nice recording (I happened to have a recording session with Gelap that day, so I couldn't visit him at his house). It was nice. I mean, just nice. No strings attached.

March 21st, 2008

The 1st movie we watched 2gether :D

After being in hot and cold conversation over the phone for some nights, finally we decided to hang out together. The first hang-out didn't go quite like what we predicted. We planned to hang out and watch some movie but then ended up going to Sarinah, watching a metal gig with Bang Didi, aL, Lulu and other friends of us. The second hang out was better. Just the two of us (ehm...) and yes, we finally went to cinema. Our first together-watched movie was.. Well, you can tell from the picture above *blushed*. There was something funny happened during our "hang-out"; My hi-school friend caught us up, walking to the exit door at the cinema, side-by-side & holding hands. I said to him that Die is my friend, but - damn I even realized it - I acted so... what do you say, uhmm... So awkwardly unnatural! I think that day is a trigger to another step of our relationship. I didn't realize that I already had a crush on him, coz as we've agreed before that we will run a cool friendship without any "meaning" behind. Latter I reckoned, cool friendship without motives, huh? So impossible, hahaha...

Day by day passed by... Midnite conversation still going. And I still in a relationship with someone afar. Yet I couldn't explain how things run for me. Until one unforgettable night, where he finally said about this whole crazy affection he felt toward me. And he kept saying that for 6 hours! Yes, 6 non-stop hours. From 12 am - 6 am. I went from laughing as it was a joke, being sarcastic, feeling unbelievable and then mumbled, "could've picked a better spot for saying it all", hahaha... But yeah, it all worked. He finally got me under his spell. I couldn't explain how everything went like it was and all I could say to him was, "Thank you. Uhmm, Die... Can you say it again?" Finally, there's something inside my tummy that jumped in and out everytime I read his name displayed on my cellphone...

And yeah, if you ask us on what date we celebrate our love-day, trust me.. We don't know :D

April - September 2008

Us holding hands together, facing the cruelty of the world

The day after I got punched & kicked by my brother. Look at my swollen eyes

Okay, the real life begins! In these months, we were facing the toughest phase in our relationship. Not the internal issues, but external. The world suddenly went against us. The people whom we thought were the closest suddenly attacked us. They were pointing their fingers toward us & grinding their sharp teeth, yelling at us. My parents and big family, my bestfriends, his bestfriends... Like, everyone! I never received this kind of rejection when I was with someone else. But when I was with Die, even the clouds formed the word "NO" for us. One thing I got hurt so bad was when I got a punch on the face and a kick on the stomach from my brother when he saw my mom cried one morning. Really, it hurt so bad, literally. But my heart hurt the worse. I could just crying in my bedroom while texting him, telling what just happened to me. I even didn't recognize my family anymore. They were becoming strangers, I didn't know them no more. I didn't understand, were we really not meant together?

October - December 2010

Us with friends on a metal gig

The renaissance months, LOL. Thanks to Allah SWT, we kept fighting to what's worth it. And for me, he's worth the fighting. Slowly, during months of struggling, I approached my family - esp. my mom - to try to think outside the box, to try to place herself into my shoes. She got depressed, and so was I. She went to our hometown to cool herself off. At forever last, I got the "green light" from my parents on December 2008. My father said to me, "If he thinks you're the one, he should come and see me". So then on December, Die came to my house and met my parents. Serious conversation they had, with the result that he would have a planning to propose me! Gawd, God works in mysterious way, don't you think so?

January 18th, 2010 - The Proposal

January 18th, The Engagement Day

The day has come. His big family came to my house and proposed me to be Die's wife. All the well-mannered proposal thingy was done. We set the date of the wedding: 04.04.09. "Three months from now... Wow! Time flies!" I yelled in my heart... I'm getting married!!!

February - March 2009

The prewed photo session

Are the busy months. We were preparing everything we need for the wedding party. Searching for the dress, submitting all needed data & documents for the "akad nikah", doing food testing, fitting gowns, doing the pre-wed photo shoot, photo printing, invitation printing until setting the online invitation website. We were all so occupied and overloaded, plus very very nervous for Die and I. I couldn't stop thinking of the worst cases, whether if the party won't go smoothly, or I'm getting fatter before the big day, or the food will be unsatisfying. To reduce the tense, I did Monday-Thursday fasting, it worked... a bit :p

April 4, 2009

The wedding

Finally, that "Someday" has come to us. Alhamdulillah... I couldn't thank more to Allah SWT for His blessing. Thank you, God. Bismillah, I entered a new chapter in my life. A new title; A wife. Well, that's huge :D

July 2009

2-month pregnant. Dreamland Bali

One night when Die picked me up at the my office to come home, I felt extraordinary nausea in my tummy. He was the one who realized I hadn't had my period, where I should have had it several days before. So I bought 2 pregnancy testers. On the first trial, the tester gave me double strips. Yes, folks... I was pregnant :)

August 2009 - April 2010

5-month pregnant, Cibodas West Java (left) & Dunkin Donut Bekasi (right)

I never imagined how is it like to be pregnant until I experience it myself. It was... well, unspoken. Happy, nervous, worried, excited, bloated, anxious.. They mixed up and I couldn't tell which one was more dominant. April 2010 was the most-waiting month for me. It was when I started to forget how to sleep well and deep. It was coming... It was getting closer...

April 4, 2010

Happy 1st Anniversary, my love! Nothing happier than celebrating your anniversary with your husband, hunting for baby clothes and stuffs. Cute, isn't it? Hehehe... We went to a baby shop to buy all baby things for welcoming my son in this world in couple days ahead. I couldn't believe I was becoming a mom. Magic! ^^

April 24, 2010 - Rayyan Widi Alastair

Rayyan in the middle of Mommy & Daddy

Die accompanied me to meet my obstetrician to have the regular check-up. I hadn't had any contraction at all, while my pregnancy was entering its 39th week. There were only a few spots and that's it. When the obstetrician checked my baby thru the Ultrasound, my embryo had lost almost all its amniotic fluid so it would be impossible for to give normal birth. Suddenly the doctor said that I must stay at the hospital because the baby must be born immediately. Shocked. Not ready. Wanted to cry all the time, that was what I felt that night. Hurriedly, I called my mom to deliver the news. I got into the surgical room at 11:30 p.m and my baby was born on 11:45 p.m. When the first time I heard him crying... That's when I realized that the 3-month continuous nausea, 6-month body stiff, 3-month unwell sleep and 9-month of carrying another soul were all worth it. I said to myself, I am the real woman now and my life has perfectly completed with his presence. Rayyan Widi Alastair; A brilliant guardian who can bring his parents to heaven with him someday. Amin... :')

May 2010 - March 2011 - Chaotic, upside-down months

Rayyan with Mom & Big Biyo

If you ask me whether I experienced a scary symptoms named "Baby Blues", my answer will be yes, I did. I don't know exactly how Baby Blues works, but all I know that this hideous feeling toward Rayyan always came at night when my husband already asleep, the rest of the family were asleep, and I and Rayyan were the only two who didn't asleep. I feel this kind of weird hatred toward my baby, I thought he was so selfish to others that he didn't want to understand my need of resting my body a bit. He made me stay awake all day and all night! I barely liked him (I'm sorry, son... *sighs*), in the morning I handed him to my mom so I could "steal" some precious minutes to close my eyes and rest. I even felt lazy to breastfeed him when he was hungry. I never expected that nursing and breastfeeding exclusively would be this tough and difficult to face. I almost gave up with the breastfeeding thing, till I joined the AsiForBaby mailing list. I collected all useful articles about breastfeeding, I printed them and I asked my husband to read it too. The successful of breastfeeding your baby is 80% obtained from the family, esp. from the husband. So to make me a breastfeeding mom, I should make my husband a breastfeeding father first. Thank God he's everything I'm looking for if I need supporter. The baby blues lasted only about 3-4 days. And Alhamdulillah until now - 19 days before my son's first birthday - I'm still breastfeeding him without any other additional cow milk. Thanks to my family who always support me from the beginning. And of course the main support comes from my husband. Die is the man. My man. My

April 4, 2011

Second anniversary of Deathlust

Happy second anniversary to us!! Our love still on fire!! Never tired to pray and beg to God to give us all things He bless. Small chaotic fun family, even more chaotic hyperactive son. Whatever it is, we just hope that He bless it all. Amin... I my Deathlust family. They're every reason I live and every second I breathe.

~G~

LDR, oh... LDR.

Akhir-akhir ini, entah karena pengaruh atau sebab apa, kalau sedang pumping gue susah sekali dapet LDR. Dalam 3 kali sesi pumping selama 10-12 jam berada dikantor, bisa jadi hanya 1-2 sesi gue bisa dapet LDR, itu juga 1 sesi paling 1x LDR. Padahal segala cara-cara baru supaya gue bisa merasa nyaman saat pumping (kecuali terpaksa menerima kenyataan dikantor gue ngga ada nursing room dan harus pumping di rest room) udah gue coba; dari mulai setel musik-musik kesukaan, bawa minuman kopi / teh (hahaha, ya benar! Saya bawa minum ke rest room) sampe nonton film-film fave sambil pumping. Awal-awal percobaan cukup membuat hati gue senang, nyaman dan akhirnya si LDR lancar jaya. Tapi selang beberapa minggu kemudian (dan gue mulai kehabisan space di HD karena kebanyakan downlod album musik & film), kembali si LDR susah didapat.

Kadang gue berpikir mungkin gue butuh suasana baru waktu pumping. Dalam artian tempat baru. Now if you were me, doing breast-pumping three times a day at work for almost a year (it almost defeats the routine of eating and breathing) at the same place every single day! How you must be feeling? Kalo loe ngga bosen, loe pasti seorang alien, atau setidaknya semacam mutant begituh... Karena walau semangat untuk memberikan ASI dan ASIP untuk Little Rayyan ngga pernah berkurang sedikitpun, gue ngga bisa pungkiri bahwa ada saat-saat dimana rutinitas pumping gue ini sangat sangat membuat gue bosan!

Pernah satu hari disaat gue sangat memimpikan untuk bisa mendapatkan LDR saat pumping jauh lebih bergelora daripada gue menginginkan gaji naik 3x lipat, seorang teman nawarin gue main ke apartemennya ngga jauh dari kantor gue. Gue iseng minta ijin buat sekalian pumping di tempat dia. And guess what? Di apartemen temen gue itu gue bisa dapat LDR sampe 3x dalam 1 sesi pumping itu!!! Gue sampe amazed sendiri gue bisa ngerasain 3x LDR sedangkan sebelumnya dapet 1x aja udah sujud sukur.

Pernah terbersit dalam pikiran gue untuk menjadi pioneer pertama yang mengajukan permohonan ke manajemen kantor gue untuk membuatkan ruang yang kecil saja, ngga usah besar banget asal nyaman, yang kemudian bisa kita sebut sebagai nursing room. Bukan apa-apa, gue udah beberapa kali baca di internet kalau terdapat bahaya ASIP bisa terkena virus-virus ngga baik kalau kita pumping di rest room, mengingat itu adalah tempat yang ngga bisa dibilang higienis. Tapi apa daya, cuma itu satu-satunya tempat yang bisa provide some prvacy. Pernah kepikiran apa gue nekad pumping di cubicle gue aja ditutupin pake apron / nursing cover, tapi ruangan gue itu ibarat jalan protokol... Segala macem manusia lewat depan ruangan gue. Se pede-pede nya gue pumping di meja sendiri tapi kalo ada bermacam ekspresi tatapan mata setiap lewat ruangan gue liat gue kebungkus kaen aneh panjang dan tangan terpusat di bagian (maap) toked kan... agak.. males... juga... yaaaaa.... -_________-

Yah, begitulah... Lagi pengen ngeluarin uneg-uneg gue aja. Selama ini temen-temen kantor gue ngeliat gue sebagai seorang ibu yang semangat banget untuk kasih ASI buat Rayyan (kalau kata temen gue "militan ASI", hehehe). But they have no idea how hard it could be, kecuali yang "been-there-done-that", mereka biasanya lebih empati dan pasti ngedukung gue, others? Banyakan ngetawainnya & ngeledeknya daripada ngedukung.

But it's the art of being a mom, isn't it? The ups and downs... Semua pada akhirnya jadi terasa indah dan menyenangkan. Tiap hari pulang bawa oleh-oleh buat anak, kalau udah sampe rumah anak liat kita sambil melet-melet, tanda dia kangen nenen sama kita. Lucunya... priceless!!

Oops! udah jam 10:30, time for the first pumping session. Oh, LDR... datanglah dikau! Please...

~G~

Let down reflex: An involuntary reflex during breastfeeding which causes the milk to flow freely.
(Taken from here)

What doesn't kill me, will make me even stronger.

I somehow don't want those things get in my way and take me too deep in a hole full of miserable. I don't want to sell my initial happiness with it and I don't want to take it for granted. I know I still have power left to fight against them, even if it has to be my last fight. I was bleeding to have what I'm having right now. I know I still can bleed more to defend it.

God hear what I ask, what I'm mourning for. God see what I fight, what I'm struggling for.
He shall see me bleeding the road if it must, for I know He will not kill me for doing it.

Coz what doesn't kill me, will make me even stronger.

God bless.

~G~

TGIF

This morning I went to the office with bad feeling. At first I thought it was something with my home or my Little Rayyan. On the bike I kept guessing the meaning of this anxiety which somehow I couldn't answer why was this feeling attacking me in a sudden. Told my husband about this, had to call home right away. But nothing happened there (Alhamdulillah), yet this feeling was still there. Not so long after that, my boss came to me and reconfirmed the meeting he must hold at 9:30 this morning.

"It's on Wisma Bakrie 1, pak" I answered.
"No. It's on 37th floor, Wed." he persisted.
"The calendar invitation mentioned WB1 instead of 37th floor, sir. If there was a venue changing in the last minute, they should've told me earlier. But no short notice received, sir".

Shocked and maybe felt like he was been fooled, he hurriedly go down to the lobby and yelled, "Call my driver now!"

Okay. I love this new office I'm working at now. It's nice, big, clean and whatever we need. But one thing, one crucial thing ruins the conformity; NO SIGNAL DETECTED HERE. On some REALLY particular spots you will get it, but the rest is the mystery (to refine the word "disaster").

Back to the story. So I called my driver once, "Unreachable", the phone screen showed. I called again for the 2nd time, 3rd, 4th, 5th... I called him for almost 10 times in a row and still his cellphone couldn't be reached. I called the car call at the lobby. My boss gave me a call, "Wed, he isn't here yet. Have you call him?", "I did sir but it seems that his cellphone is out of the signal."

"Should I really have to care bout that now, Wed?", Okay Wed, stop talking. Give the magic words, "I'm still trying, pak." Click, he cut the line.

I tried to call his cellphones again and again, and for forever last, the phone connected. Fiuhh, God!!

Told him to stand by at the lobby a.s.a.p, but when I was about to smile for this stupid achievement, my boss called me again,

"This is pathetic. I'm on my way to WB1."
"Errr... " Couldn't sure his driver drove that fast from the basement to the lobby, plus my boss' voice sounded... unfriendly *smirk*
"By a CAB!"

Nah! That answered why he sounded so unfriendly, then...

"I'll told him to go straight away to WB1, pak. So sorry, the signal sucks".
"Okay, never mind." He sighed.

Huff, that was close!

Bad feeling doesn't always related to the family issues, huh?! Learn from that today *deep inhale*

Let's pump sum milk then, hope the bad feeling will go or else I won't get my Let Down Reflex moment -_____-

Thank God it's Friday!!!

~G~

Glittery hitches, bitterly glitches.

Tough things (should) make me strong and make us even stronger. These days probably are one of those toughest time for us. We've been hit by some unwanted situation several times in a row. I know Allah is aiming His eyes on us now, He is giving some trials for us to intensify our religious foundation and our faith to his Mightiness. I really think that we are being rebuked by Him for some of our negligence and ignorance through these time. Yet in other way, it is showing that He expresses his affection to us. And for that, I thank Him more...

I am recalling tough time we had back then when we were dying to convince people (who were against us) that the love we had was so pure and strong and that we will hold hands together to face the bittersweet realities upon us, to resolve all problems standing in front of us, ready to stumble us down. Until the grip is broken, until death breaks it.

And now, we should do what we already did not so long ago; standing side by side, face up, calm down and ready to withstand the storm of hitches and glitches together.

I have to always remember one thing; We may have big problems, but our God is BIGGER.

باسم الله الرحمن الرحيم

~G~

Kembung.

Saya kembung
Seperti kepenuhan isi
Entahlah apa
Tapi saya merasa tidak berisi
Seperti kembung saja
Penuh tapi hampa
Rasanya mau ke toilet setiap saat
Membuang sisa-sisa kotoran lengseran dari si kembung
Tapi tidak bisa. Kembungnya ngadat
Seperti tersumbat tidak mau keluar
Tidak ketemu jalan keluarnya
Toiletnya pun rusak dan kotor
Jadi makin kembung saja melihatnya
Mau dibuang kemana ini kembung?
Kentut saja susah, bikin makin sakit rasanya
Dan sekarang hanya bisa pasrah
Menunggu si kembung sadar akhirnya
Bahwa disitu bukan tempat untuknya
Mungkin dia bisa cari orang lain untuk dikembungi

Sementara
Saya masih tersakit-sakit menahan kembung ini
Sendiri
Tanpa orang lain harus menyadari...

~G~

♥ Alhamdulillah... I finally passed it! ♥

Woooow! Akhirnya anak gue lulus S1 ASIX juga! What a struggle, man... Setelah dulu hampir menyerah dengan ASI eksklusif (ASIX) dan berniat memberikan Little Rayyan susu formula (Sufor), akhirnya dengan perjuangan, konsistensi dan niat dari hati, anak gue bisa mendapatkan apa yang sudah menjadi hak asasi dia sebagai manusia --> ASI! Oh yeah, buat kalian yang belum menjadi ibu, mungkin berpikir bahwa memberikan ASIX kepada anak selama 6 bulan sambil bekerja itu tidak akan sulit. Oh wow wow wow, wait until you experience it yourself! ;p

Little Rayyan - new born (April 24, 2010)

Menunggu nunggu kapan lahirnya bayi yang sudah ditunggu banyak orang ini. Kontraksi tak kunjung datang, flek hanya keluar sedikit2, padahal senam hamil, jalan pagi & sore, minum air putih sebaskom sudah dilakoni... Tapi baby ini masih betah didalam rupanya. Duh, Nak... Mama ingin sekali melihatmu...

Mama sms DSA-mu, balasannya "Datang saja hari Sabtu sore ini, kita check up seperti biasa. Don't panic, everything's gonna be okay." Sampai di RS Herm*na jam 3, mama senam hamil dulu seperti biasa. DSA mu praktek jam.6, mama dapat bagian di saat jam menunjukkan pukul 7 malam. "Kita USG dulu ya Bu" kata si dokter. Semua oke, ngga ada kekurangan satu apapun, "Yang kurang cuma ngga ada kontraksi ya? Perut tegang pun ngga ada, Bu?" tanya DSA-nya, mama menggeleng. "Coba kita cek air ketubannya ya, kalau masih banyak mending tunggu 2-3 hari lagi kalau ibu bersikeras persalinan normal"

Waktu di cek air ketuban, DANG!!! "Bu, air ketubannya berkurang drastis!! Tinggal 40%. Sorry, we can't wait any longer. Ibu ngga mungkin melahirkan normal, takut bayinya lengket di janin. Kita operasi ya Bu. Lebih baik Ibu ngga usah pulang kerumah lagi. Telepon rumah, minta siapin baju2 untuk perawatan disini. Kita operasi malam ini juga." MY GOD!! Mama belom siap sama sekali. Gimana rasanya dibius lokal? Sakit ngga? Suami boleh ikut masuk dok? Saya kan mau IMD dok, kalau SC masih bisa kan? Serentetan pertanyaan (plus rasa panik gila2an) melanda mama bertubi-tubi sampai mama ngga bisa berkata apa2 di jeda waktu menunggu detik2 di operasi. Mama ngga sabar mau nimang kamu, Rayyan.. Tapi mama juga ngga siap kalau kamu harus keluar lewat "jendela" instead of "pintu"...

23:45 --> Kamu lahir.. Mama teriak ke DSA km untuk segera taruh kamu di dada mama. Tapi kata dokter anestesinya suhu kamu ngedrop drastis dan harus segera di inkub. Mama teriak suhu kamu bisa normal asal mama peluk sambil IMD, dokter bersikeras bawa kamu menjauh dari mama. Mama sukses... sukses GAGAL IMD!! Mama marah banget waktu itu... Mama udah niatan mau nyusuin km eksklusif & IMD itu berperan SANGAT penting buat keberhasilan mama menyusui kamu, but they made it impossible for you to get your rights - my milk - in the first place. Hey, dokter anestesi.. FUCK YOU!!! *hanya bisa berkata dalam hati sambil lemah lunglai karena masih dibawah pengaruh bius*

Pagi hari, April 25, 2010

Mama ngga bisa tidur semaleman, Nak... Papamu tidurnya juga jadi ngga nyenyak karena kasian ngeliatin mama resah semaleman menunggu kamu dibawa kekamar perawatan mama. Mama mau nyusuin kamu. Haduh, sebel banget kalo diinget2 lagi kenapa lama sekali susternya bawa kamu ke mama. Mama cuma berdoa dalam hati semoga suster2 itu ngga ngasih km sufor. Akhirnya kamu dianter ke kamar mama. Iiiih,,,, YOU'RE DEFINITELY GORGEOUS!!! Your nose sucked my attention, boy... Mancungnyaaaaa! hohohohoho... Si suster langsung siapin posisi menyusui, "Bu, kalau bisa ASI eksklusif yah... Ngga ada susu apapun yang menandingi kandungan ASI" kata susternya. Alhamdulillah, ternyata suster2 disini pro-ASI.

Pertama nyusuin kamu, aduh.. tes tes tes... Cuma setetes2 yang ngalir ke mulut Rayyan. Mama sampe ngga pede apa ASI mama cukup buat kamu. Susternya melihat kegusaran mama, kata dia, "Ngga apa2 Bu, ibu beruntung ASI nya udah keluar walau cuma tetesan aja. Banyak ibu2 lain yang sampai 2-3 hari belum keluar loh ASI nya. Sabar aja, yang penting PEDE & relax yah". Mama inget pertama kali nyusuin kamu itu memakan waktu 3,5 jam!! Wow, tangan mama sampe pegel gendong kamu, Cuplis! Hihihi.. Papanya langsung kasih kamu sebutan "Pangeran Nenen", hahaha...

Middle of May, 2010

Kamu mengalami yang namanya Growth Spurt, pertumbuhan bayi yang terjadi sangat cepat. Akibatnya bayi bisa menyusui lebih lama dari biasanya. Seharian dek kamu nyusu di mama. Asal kecopot aja nenen mama dari mulutmu, kamu langsung nangis gila2an. Walhasil mama cuma bisa lepas nenen dari kamu waktu mau ke kamar mandi & salat. Makan? Mama disuapin nenek kamu, dek! Coba bayangin, ahahahaha... Sempet mama mikir, apa ASI mama kurang yah? Makanya km nyusu seharian ngga puas2?

Suatu malam km terbangun dan nangis sampai berjam-jam. Mama takut kamu kenapa2, jam 1 malam mama, papa sama nenek pergi ke klinik terdekat dan periksain kamu. Km cuma dikasih vitamin, tp mama bimbang.. Vitamin? Buat bayi? Emang perlu? Bener ternyata ngga ngaruh, km tetep nangis malam2 seperti biasa, sampai kakek nyeletuk, "ASI nya kurang tuh! ASI km ngga banyak. Anak km nyusunya kenceng lagi. Beliin susu formula aja", DANG!!!! Karena lack of info, lack of confidence dan namanya juga new mommy yang banyakan paniknya daripada calm down-nya, akhirnya mama "termakan" omongan kakek. Apalagi pas kakek dengan sukarela membelikan kamu sufor. Kali pertama mama kasih kamu sufor (dan hati mama pedih banget), kamu lahap banget nak mimiknya. Sampe mama akhirnya yakin penyebab kamu nangis karena kurangnya ASI mama, hix...

End of May, 2010

Dua minggu sudah kamu "tercemar" susu formula, dan mama masih saja selalu merasa sedih setiap kali harus kasih kamu susu itu. Sampai suatu malam, saat biasanya mama udah siapin sufor buat Rayyan kalau tengah malam kamu bangun dan haus, tiba2 timbul pikiran badung mama buat ngga nyiapin sufor buat kamu. Mama ajak Rayyan bobo sambil nenen. Kamu mau, lho! Alhamdulillah... Tinggal mama deg-degan nunggu nanti malam kira2 kamu mau ngga mimik ASI mama walau aliran susunya ngga sederas kalau kamu mimik dari botol. Dan bangun lah kamu sekitar jam.2, nangis. Mama ngucap Bismillah dan sodorin nenen mama ke kamu sambil bisik ke telinga kamu, "Sayang, ASI mama masih banyak, lebih sehat lagi. Biar Rayyan pinter, mimik ASI aja ya Nak", dan amazingly... kamu mau!! Kamu nyusu dengan semangatnya sampe 1,5 jam! Ngantuk mama ilang berganti dengan semangat dan rasa percaya diri. Anak gue mau nyusu lagi!! Aaaahh, senengnya ngga terkira, dek ^^ Lambat laun mama stop penggunaan sufor buat kamu, hanya dalam waktu 2 hari kamu udah bebas sufor lagi dan pindah ke ASI eksklusif lagi. Alhamdulillah, my confirdence raised drastically ever since. Sejak itu mama gila2an Googling everything about breastfeeding. Sampai mama ikut milis Asi For Baby & follow @aimi_asi di twitter. I gained tons of useful information about parenting, nak.. Mama beli Buku "Smart Parents For Healthy Children" dari Markas Sehat. Semua untuk Rayyan, semua untuk smart parenting. Dan perjuangan mama nyusuin kamu juga kamu dukung sepenuhnya. Kamu bantuin mama tanpa banyak protes dan rengekan. Thank you, Rayyan-ku. Pintarnya kamu...

July 19th, 2010

My first day of work (again!!), after 3 months of maternity leave. You can never tell how hard was it for me to leave you at home with your granny & nanny. Di motor otw ke kantor mama nangis inget Rayyan. Mama pengen teriak ke papa untuk antar mama balik kerumah lagi. Rasa2nya ngga sanggup ninggalin anak mama yang masih 3 bulan kekantor seharian. Duh! Bener2 deh rasa itu ngga enak banget! Sampe sehari mama nelepon kerumah sampe 4x, nenekmu sampe marah2 ke mama dan bilang kalo Rayyan baik2 aja dan ngga usah khawatir, hehehe...

Perjuangan pumping dimulai. Mama udah bertekad dari mama hamil untuk bisa kasih ASIX sampe kamu 6 bulan. Mama udah mulai pumping & stok ASI dari sebulan sebelum mama balik ngantor lagi. Isi freezer udah penuh dengan ASIP mama, ihiiy seneng deh! Setidaknya mama jadi lebih pede buat ninggalin Rayyan kerja. Minggu & bulan pertama mama kerja juga semangaaat banget mama pumping. Sehari 3x, pagi, siang dan sore. Seneng liat hasil pumping seharian, mama bisa bawa oleh2 setengah liter ASIP buat Rayyan.

Awal Ramadhan, August 15th, 2010

Mama dapat kabar kalau nenek buyut kamu sakit parah. Udah ngga bisa bangun dari tempat tidur, ngga bisa ngomong dan ngga ngenalin wajah orang lagi. Nenek Rayyan sampai nangis2 terus dan berkali2 bilang mau pulang kampung buat jagain nenek buyut Rayyan. Dan bener, nenek akhirnya pulang kampung. Rayyan sama mama aja, sama nanny aja. Mama ngga sadar setelah ditinggal nenek kamu mama jadi stress. Ngga ada tambahan bantuan tangan untuk ngurus Rayyan. Tiba2 di bulan kedua mama kerja, ASI mama berkurang drastis!! 40 cc aja dua payudara sekali pumping. Padahal biasanya mama bisa dapat 150-200 cc!! Ya Allah, mama kaget banget!

Akhirnya mama curhat sama nenek kamu. Mama bilang mama stress di kantor & stress mikirin Rayyan dirumah kalau lagi mama tinggal kerja. Nenek kamu nyaranin untuk ke klinik laktasi buat cari pencerahan. Akhirnya mama kesana, mama ngga mau tekad bulat mama untuk kasih kamu ASI kandas ditengah jalan. Padahal Rayyan udah mau 4 bulan. 2 bulan lagi sebelum Rayyan lulus S1 ASI...

Setelah ketemu konselor ASI, mama beberapa kali spare 5 minutes di musholla habis shalat untuk relaksasi. Mama berdiam diri, sambil berdoa semoga Allah masih kasih kepercayaan ke mama untuk ngerawat Rayyan sekuat yang mama bisa. Alhamdulillah ngga sampai seminggu produksi ASI mama bisa balik ke semula lagi. Lagi-lagi semangat mama bangkit lagi. Stok ASI yang mulai menipis jadi makin banyak lagi ^^

October 24th, 2010

Yaaaaay!! Hari ini mama seneeeng banget! Akhirnya kamu lulus S1 ASI juga, nak! Haduh rasanya 6 bulan itu lama banget! Tapi di lain sisi juga berasa cepet. Tiba2 kamu udah bisa ngoceh, udah jago tengkurep, bisa duduk, mulai berdiri walau masih dipegangin. Udah bisa marah2 ngomel2 sendiri kalo mama/papa cuekin padahal kamunya minta diajak main. Udah bisa nendang2, jambak rambut papa, cakar muka mama. Bahkan kamu udah bisa tergagap-gagap nyebut, "Ma ma ma" atau "ngga", padahal kamu masih 6 bulan! Wow! Anak ASI emang hebat yah. Mama bangga banget sama kamu, Cuplis. Walaupun rambut kamu numbuhnya ngga rata (hihihi...), tapi setidaknya kamu ngga langganan sakit yang aneh2, ngga kaya temen2 sebaya kamu, anak-anak sufor yang langganan kena flu/demam/batuk/diare minimal sebulan sekali. Kamu ngga. Kamu sehat, lebih sehat dari yang bisa mama harapkan. Kamu hebat Nak.


Jadi, mama rasa ngga salah kalau mama merasa bangga bisa berikan kamu yang terbaik. Hak kamu sebagai manusia. Hak kamu sebagai anak mama, bukan anak sapi. Karena itu, hak kamu dapat Air Susu Ibu.

Mama dan Papa sayang Rayyan, mwah!!

~G~

Aku malaas.AVI

Playing with his daddy. Learning to crawl steadily but he was too lazy and tired to even try it. So he was just moving his head up and down as fast as a second, LOL.

Breast is BEST.

It was what I read on the nursery room at RSIA Hermina, Bekasi when I went there with my Die, my Little Rayyan and the nanny. We went there last Saturday, I wanted to meet the lactation counselor to ask her some important questions about breastfeeding. For the past week, my milk was rapidly reducing, and I couldn't figure out why. Some said about my eating disorder or maybe the imbalance of my meal nutrition. But some others said (and this made sense more than the previous one) that I was being too stressful and tensed.

The lactation counselor taught me the basic knowledge about breast milk and breastfeeding. How to breastfeed you baby, the right position in breastfeeding him, how to improve the quantity of the milk and how to be successful in breastfeeding the baby for the WM (working mom) like me.

It is never easy, to successfully and exclusively breastfeeding your baby for six months and then extended it with the supplementary food until he is 2 years old. Many mothers - especially the working moms - give up in breastfeeding and substitute their babies' demand on milk with formulas. From the five pregnant ladies (were) at my office (and all them have become mommies), only me who's still breastfeeding my son exclusively. Two of them gave up and give their babies formulas, and two others combine the breast milk and the formulas to fulfill the babies' need.

And I swear God, ladies and gents... It is so fucking damn HARD to keep my spirit up high and my commitment to give Rayyan exclusive breast milk until he is 6 months. Still 2 months to go and time suddenly runs so.. so.. slow when it comes to survive in the exclusive breastfeeding thingy! First of all, you need your husband there to support you every time, anytime and everywhere you need him. To make your husband supports you, he has to be the breast milk father first. A breast milk father is a father who knows ALL about the importance of breastfeeding and give the baby only his mother's milk until he is six months. And a breast milk father is so damn hard to find, because most fathers assume that all the breastfeeding thing is mothers' stuff, not theirs.

My husband was one of them, the not-breastfeeding father. He didn't know anything about breastfeeding, he gave all this matter to me (because I'm the one who got BREASTS! Oh please...) and when Rayyan started to cry, he said maybe it was because he was hungry and my milk didn't fulfill his need over milk, so he suggested me to buy formulas!

Stupidly, I was being intimidated too deep (noted that my family was also not a breastfeeding family) that I finally gave up with my spirit and gave my Rayyan formulas :'(. It lasted for almost 3 weeks until I realized of how stupid I am for being too selfish to myself and not taking Rayyan as my priority. I chose an easy way without concerning about his healthiness. Ever since, I directly stopped giving him formulas and collected my self-confidence once more that I am able and MUST be able to breastfeed my baby exclusively until he is six months.

Alhamdulillah, I could do re-lactation to Rayyan with no difficulties. He was so clever and never whined to have some more milk that what I could give to him. And Alhamdulillah, apparently my milk is enough for him. No other thing a mother needs a lot than a full support from her loved ones. I could finally gain a full support from my husband and family after giving them some articles about breastfeeding. Slowly but sure, my mom started to support my activity to pump and to stock my milk a month before I got back to work, so Rayyan still can drink my milk while I'm on work. My mom took care of him while I was doing breast pumping. On weekend, Die took over the duty to play with him. My spirit leveled up and my confidence boosted. It was all from them, the people of my life. Not to mention all my friends from AsiForBaby mailing list. Thanks to them, I could learn and know all about motherhood (Though I never met you, but I love you all, smart mommies!)

Back to work. I felt like I was thrown from my bed to the lake full of starving alligators. They are all chasing at me, grinding their sharp teeth and be ready to eat me alive. I was shocked for how much work I have to do in such a little time I had, and I haven't experience the tensed working atmosphere anymore for three months. How ugly was that? I was pressed down, thrown right and left, jumped up high and BHAM! fell hardly to the earth again. I wasn't ready to face all these rushes at work. That's when I was getting depressed and stressed.

Yet, I didn't notice that until last week, when I had to let go my Mom. She was going to our hometown to take care of our sick grandma. My helper has gone... Thank God I have Turni, my nanny. She's an experienced and neat nanny. She only needed 2-3 days to be closed emotionally with my Little Rayyan. I am so thankful to have her as our nanny. I don't have to be worried that much when leaving him to work. But still, it didn't reduce my tensed and stressed feeling... Until I realized that my milk was reducing. After asking advices from some friends, I decided to go to the lactation counselor to seek for another helper and spirit booster :).

Still 2 months, 2 long months to go before I can say "Alhamdulillah", or "Yay!! I did it!". I don't wanna give up. I won't give up and I must not give up in breastfeeding my baby until he doesn't want it anymore. My milk is his human right. If I don't give him his right, I don't deserve to be called a good mother. And I hate a word "bad".

Hope all my efforts to improve my milk will succeed. Bismillah... I'm sure Allah SWT will help me getting through this noble duty. Of course, by HIS will. I know you will help me God... Help me doing this "jeehad" thing without making any anarchy behavior, LOL.

Bismillah, wish me luck, guys ^^

~G~

Things I can do again post delivery.

I once said that being pregnant can officially bound you in an absolute way, in every way. You have to put your pregnancy above all your priorities and no compromise for it. I was there not so long ago. I had to put aside several of my fave things that could harm my baby. Yet in other way, my baby made me learn to be more tolerant and reduce my selfishness and self-centered as well (thank you, my handsome! Love you sooooo...)

And now, I have my Little Rayyan born safely and healthily to this world. Though I still have to control the dosage of consuming and wearing these things while I am still breastfeeding him, yet I'm now back to be able to do these things without being worried too much. Those are:

1. Sushi.
Yes. I'm sooo crazy about Sushi, especially Tekka Maki and Spicy Salmon Roll. I fancy Sashimi also. They are all sooo delicious and I can't picture myself get bored with those. But ever since I got pregnant, Sushi was forbidden to be eaten by me. Or it should be... Yet once and twice I still ate those foods when being pregnant, LOL. Well, I've said I never get bored with Sushi, wasn't I? ;P







2. High heeled shoes.
I used to be a girl who hated to wear hi-heels. Thanks to the table manner course on the class when I was still at college, I suddenly felt comfort wearing them. Moreover, when at work, wearing hi-heels is like a "uniform" for my girl colleagues.











3. Headbanging.
Stiffed neck is a proper payback after headbanging. But one thing you can't pay is the satisfaction when doing it. I could harm my baby inside my embryo if I did it back then when I was pregnant. But now... It's free!!! ;P


















4. Durian.
The heat produced by Durian made me have to stop munching one of my fave fruits; DURIAN. It's bcoz it could harm my embryo. Several pregnant ladies lost their babies after eating too much Durian and most of them who didn't realize that they were pregnant. And when realized it, it's a little too late :( So yes, avoid Durian when you're pregnant, ladies.















5. Black Coffee.
Did not really know the harmfulness of drinking black coffee, but IMO, black coffee consists of much more harmful substances than other kinds of drinks like tea or creamed coffee.














6. Legging.
It was simply becoz my fat wide bubbling tummy did not fit in with the common-size of legging. LMAO.

And how about you, Mommies? ;)
~G~

Life... Oh life.

Life, oh life, oh life, oh life,
doo, doot doot dooo.
Life, oh life, oh life, oh life,
doo, doot dooo

One of my fave songs by Desree... Yeps. Sometimes life can make us say "Oh" or "Yeah" or maybe we could just sigh about it. Life is a teacher, a game, a circuit, an insane existence, a roller coaster. Things change, so do people. And mine is one of them.

I never could figure how my life could be in the next year or in the next day. I remember the first time I opened an account here in Multiply, I was just a student and still got lots of academic achievements to reach. It was 4 years ago. And look at me now.

Married. A new mom. A good job (Alhamdulillah) and no longer a vocalist of Gelap.  Who could predict that? The ups and downs I've been through. And I can never be any more thankful to Allah for what I have achieved until now.

When the first time I met Die on June 2007, was when I watched his ex-band's gig - Purgatory - at Bulungan with some random friends who - ironically - have been separated now. Only one left to be my purest friend among the rest. Frankly speaking, I never had any special feeling to him. He's nice of course, but that was it. I had set my mind that I will only treat him like my other boy friends. He was (and still is) one of the purest boy friends of mine. Never had any hidden meaning when running the friendship with me. His ignorance yet gentle attitude. His down-to-earth style. His good and sometimes sarcastic sense of humor. All of them make me - and maybe his other friends - comfortable to hang out with him. Who knows what will happen to us?

And now he is my husband.

When I was still at colleague, I and my besties sometimes wondered who will be the first one to get married. Those with unclear love status (and it was often me. Hahaha) were considered as those who will get married the latest. With my track record in love relationship, I failed many times. I'm not like Dian, the one who has been in relationship with her boyfriend (and now has become her husband) for 10 years! Or I'm not like Rae, the most picky girl I've ever known. For 6 years in colleague, she never had a boyfriend. Just a lil crush to this boy and a bit flirting to that man... But none left on her heart until she met Sidi, her husband now. Me? Oh, the dumb ass adventurer who will always ended up alone and broken. Yeah, I don't belong to hurt but belong to be broken (damn!).

Yet apparently, I was the second person among my six besties who found my soulmate and got married.

When being offered a job in my office at 2007, I didn't have a good feeling that I could improve my career here, regarding that the company I am working for is one if the biggest companies in Indonesia. At that time, I still studied at colleague and put my work as my second priority, because I still had to finish my final paper in order to graduate. Let alone the love relationship. Ever since I broke up with my serious ex-bf in 2006, I never... I repeat, I NEVER met a good man. I met lots of them, flirted and dated some of them, but they are all jerks. Until I met Die on 2007. So fuck romance at that time. I put my priority to my final paper and in improving my career. The first position I came into was being a receptionist. Not much work to do, did not have to go overtime, but had to have a big BIG heart and a wide WIDE smile. I didn't complain anyway, with a loose job, I could sneakingly do my final paper while at work. And Alhamdulillah I could do it. Who knows that in the next month the HR Manager offered me for another position?

And now I have become the secretary of a Chief Communications & Administration Officer and do several stuffs of Public Relations duties, my field of expertise.

I love music. I do sing and I played guitar a bit in high school. I always  desire to have a band. I have been in several bands until now. Pop, alternative and the latest was progressive gothic metal. I firstly met this (used-to-be) friend of mine at Senayan on June 2007, when we were watching a metal gig. She just formed a new band named Gelap then she gave me their single titled "Ashes". Frankly speaking, I did love the song. Not so long after that, she came to me and asked me to follow the audition for the second vocal in her band. Surprisingly, I was looking for friends to form a band after I graduated. Felt like fate, or maybe it was, I joined Gelap on July 2007. Lots of gigs, lots of new friends from the scene, lots of upsets for the jaded fee or the jaded gig committees, lots of member and manager changing. Who knows what will happen 3 years later?

I was disbanded from the band for - IMO - purely personal reasons from her. I decided to cut  all form of relationship with her ever since.

Several years ago, I always thought that having kids is a disaster! Getting married is a suicide (Just like her writing. So representative. Like it a lot, sistah!). No more freedom in this world, my world. After getting married, I and Die had agreed to cancel the pregnancy. We wanted to extend our dating term and had fun as much as we could. But Lord, a motherhood is really a natural sense inside every woman alive, no matter how tomboy, how metal and how independent she is. Two months after married, I BADLY craved for baby.

And now I have the most-handsome gorgeous creature on earth I can call as my child, Rayyan Widi Alastair.

Life. One I consider as a huge game of God. A game I must win. A game I must succeed in facing all the obstacles and booby traps inside it. A game I should find the runaway exit with a ticket written "Heaven" on it.

Life. The most logic thing that often drives people mad and un-logic. When foes become friends and friends become foes. Many things of life we cannot find the answer. It's beyond our competence. It's when God works.

But one thing I still believe in life is... miracle. When nothing else is sane enough to accept, miracle completes it. And I'm thankful for my miracles; Die, Little Rayyan, my besties ,time, heart and wounds inside it.

"Time heals all wounds" -- Kikan Namara of Cokelat.

~G~

Rayyan Widi Alastair.

Born: April 24, 2010
Time: 23:45
Location: RSIA Hermina Bekasi
Delivery: Section

RAYYAN --> From Arabic language means the guardian of Heaven.

WIDI --> From a Sansekerta language means konwledge. It also stands for deWI and buDI.

ALASTAIR --> From a Gerika language means a protector of mankind.

So we pray that our son could become a smart and brilliant protector / guardian for everyone he loves and could bring us - the parents - to heaven, Amin... ^^

Love you so much, my Little Rayyan

~ G ~

- d.o.n.e -

Even a dog knows when is the right time to bark. It does not always loyal and is willing to lick your dirty feet all the time as you wish. My suggestion? Go lick them by your own, dog handler. I'm DONE! \m/

~G~

Rayyan Widi Alastair.

Counting weeks, counting days, counting hours, counting minutes and counting seconds until the day when Allah gives you permission to born to this world. I'm so can wait, and really CAN'T wait... "Rayyan Widi Alastair" My first son. :)

Photo: my 34-week Rayyan in my tummy.
Edited: Die

What was the weirdest gift you ever received?

A toilet paper as my birthday present long long time ago. That was because I often went to the rest room during the class transmission. Just to escape from the class / the lecturer :D

Ask me anything

If you could instantly become an expert at one style of dance, what style would you pick?

Booty-shaking. Not an ordinary booty-shaking, but a Beyonce's kinda booty-shaking, lol

Ask me anything

If you could have a super power, what would it be?

Of course... FLYING WITHOUT WINGS!!! :D

Ask me anything

What TV show makes you laugh the loudest?

Starting from the oldest: The Cosby Show, America's Funniest Home Videos, Friends, Everybody Loves Raymond, Extravaganza, Tawa Sutra and the latest is Opera Van Java :p

Ask me anything

formspring.me

If you were offered the job of U.S. president would you take the job?

Anything related to Politics is so not me. So thanks for the job offer, but yes for the salary, hahaha :D

Ask me anything

formspring.me

sudah makan belum?

Sudaaaah, si Kriwil sudah kenyaaang, apalagi mamanyaa... hehehe

Ask me anything

formspring.me

Do you believe in ghosts?

I believe in spirit. Ghost only appeared once on 1990. Belated Patrick Swayze & Demi Moore, remember?

Ask me anything

Lagi hamil minum kopi, amankah?!

December 24, 2007

Bolehkah Minum Kopi Selama Hamil?

Masalah :

Assalamualaikum wr wb

Dokter Zubairi Yth,

Saya adalah seorang penggemar kopi. Saya biasa minum kopi minimal lima cangkir sehari, di rumah, di kantor, dan sepulang kantor seringkali ke kafe. Masalahnya, saat ini saya mendapati diri saya positif hamil. Suami saya mengatakan agar saya menghentikan kebiasaan minum kopi tersebut selama hamil, karena dapat berpengaruh buruk ke bayi. Ketika datang ke dokter kandungan pun beliau menyarankan hal yang sama. Cuma rasanya berat sekali jika harus berhenti sama sekali minum kopi. Apakah orang hamil sama sekali tidak boleh minum kopi? Mungkin ada batas aman berapa kali maksimal saya bisa minum kopi sehari?

Rita, Jakarta

Jawaban :

Waalaikumussalam wr wb

Ibu Rita,

Sebelumnya saya ucapkan selamat atas kehamilan Anda. Minum kopi memang nikmat, dan banyak orang tidak bisa lepas dari kopi setiap harinya. Memang selama kehamilan, banyak hal yang perlu dicermati, salah satunya makanan/minuman yang dikonsumsi.

Penelitian-penelitian mengenai pengaruh kopi pada kehamilan saat ini masih memberikan hasil yang beragam, ada yang mengatakan efeknya buruk, sebagian mengatakan tidak ada pengaruhnya. Yang umumnya diteliti adalah efek kopi terhadap keguguran, kelahiran prematur, dan berat lahir bayi yang rendah.

Senyawa dalam kopi yang dianggap berpengaruh pada kehamilan adalah kafein. Namun perlu diingat, selain kopi, kafein juga terkandung dalam cokelat, teh, dan kola. Kafein juga sering dicampurkan dengan beberapa jenis obat, seperti obat flu, antinyeri, perangsang nafsu makan, dan lain-lain.

Hal yang banyak muncul dari penelitian mengenai pengaruh kopi pada kehamilan adalah efeknya terhadap keguguran dan berat janin meningkat sesuai dengan bertambahnya dosis kafein. Oleh karena itu, maka para ahli menganjurkan untuk menghentikan atau setidaknya mengurangi dosis kopi yang diminum.

Dosis kopi yang dianggap 'aman' adalah 300 mg kafein per hari. Satu cangkir kopi dianggap rata-rata mengandung 100 mg per hari. Namun, harus hati-hati dengan anggapan ini. Seringkali penggemar kopi menyukai kopi yang kental, sehingga jumlah kafeinnya per gelas akan lebih banyak. Selain itu, tergantung ukuran gelasnya, jika menggunakan mug tentu lebih banyak dari cangkir.

Harus diingat pula, bahwa minum kopi juga dapat menurunkan penyerapan terhadap sejumlah mineral yang penting dalam kehamilan, seperti kalsium dan besi.

Maka, untuk praktisnya, sebaiknya Anda hanya minum kopi secangkir sehari. Karena selain mungkin secangkir kopi yang Anda minum kandungan kafeinnya lebih dari 100 mg, Anda juga mungkin makan/minum sumber kafein lain selama hamil, misalnya cokelat. Kalau bisa, minum kopinya tidak usah setiap hari.

dr. Zubairi Djoerban

Sumber : Republika Online

***

Oh Kopi, ternyata kita tidak harus bercerai, kita hanya harus break sebentar. Sabar yang kopi hitam, 5 bulanan lagi kok....

~ G ~

Surreal.

She smiles so wide. The happiness is at hands when she finally can reach it, or she thinks she can. The dream seems so lucid and real she barely can touch and feel. She refuses any reality check from every known person. Welcoming night is all she is, stepping one-two-three with jumping heartbeat and flies in her belly. It is an Eden in her own world back grounded by a heaven in her own universe she built in an unpainted painting vase. Then she stops to have a look, in a minute... And the other minute.

Her smile becomes wider. She will keep it.

She is on her dream.

Dream on.

~ G ~

The Bumils (cannot) wears Prada.

Damn. I'm suddenly wanting to wear my hi-heels again. It's been five months I haven't wear all of my hi-heels shoes. all of 'em are neatly stored inside my cubicle closet.

Still 5 months to go before you can wear them again, Wed...! Huhuhu...

*Aduuuh, tiba-tiba pengen cakwe... Jualan dimana deket2 kantor yah?

Photo: Me some years ago

It means you... two.

I am now standing at the most fragile foothold
At the end of the bitterness, whereas you ever once stood in here too
Like you've thousand-ly told me

See? You love to be in the midst of ambiguities
And hurt people around you as you have done for so many times
Hung their hopes upon your covered nothingness
And they would put their tongues out for watching you fall
Waiting as they would waste their times
Time which keeps ticking as it eats you
And it eats them
And you will all root

Again, I'm still standing here at the most fragile foothold
Thinking of what could have been
I hate this vagueness and I hate my nothingness
It's like the way I hate to hurt as they way I really wish to hate you

But on the second of my paradoxical thought
Would that make any difference?
While hating is the most ambiguous thing I ever felt
I am most likely to step back and ramp off
I will fill my nothingness to something
Something certain
Yes, something unlike you

I'm setting myself to avoid hatred
One thing you love to do most
And I'm avoiding it
Avoiding you

~ G ~